I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
