we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
