Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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