3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Randomize
