I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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