If that was your dad, he is hot
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
The uberlube is also flammable
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
