If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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