butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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