dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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