I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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