Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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