Christians are straight up FREAKS
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
