the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
