went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
