What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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