I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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