Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
At least make sure they are 18
Why
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
ugly people sure do ruin things
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
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