I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
