"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Fuck appropriateness.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
