are you so shy because you have an std?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
