he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
