just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
