You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize