i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize