he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
