K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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