every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
