i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
