I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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