i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
