Is it normal to miss your booty call?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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