What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
