Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
