wrigley field is MILF paradise
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
