careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
