no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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