He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
