Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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