we have officially lost it.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
