you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
