btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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