I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
