He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
