i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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