THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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