I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
