awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize