I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Randomize