KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
