is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
